Bananas look like boomerangs And if you’re tempted, call a halt For if you don't quite get the hang You could be looking at assault
Nudism in cubism Falls under The Abstract And artist folk behind each stroke Admit it’s inexact. The avant garde can leave some jarred So, should you choose to pose Don’t be surprised to find your eyes Where most look for their toes.
At Cana, water turned to wine Delighting all the guests And showed the world The Great Divine Considers all requests. Although some question Was it prayer? Or did a son discover The force behind a mother's glare Is unlike any other?
The ostrich claims the biggest eggs The longest neck and strongest legs. Give thanks these birds don't fly about For just one turd would knock you out.
“Have you been following events in The Ukraine?” “John, we no longer call it that.” “No longer call what what?” “We no longer call it The Ukraine.” “What are you talking about?” “We just say Ukraine now; they've dropped the The,” Laverne gave me the lowdown. “Who did?” “The Ukrainians.” “Don’t you mean Ukrainians?” “That’s … Continue reading Peace Nicked
Where do storks nest during a warAs spires tumble and towns are no more?What will deer eat when tanks advanceOver sweet meadows of young, tender plants?What drives a cub out of the denCrying alone for its mother again?Gone is the goldDark is the dawnGhostly and coldBest to fly on
The platypus unsettles those Who organise their socks in rows Who’d never sport a check with stripes The this-goes-better-with-that types. Is it both mammal and a bird? The mere suggestion is absurd A beaver that can lay an egg? Now try and pull the other leg… Although it doesn’t quack or cluck At first glance, … Continue reading Glamour Puss
My valentine suggested wine I bought the best champagne Then after making love we dined On Chocolate Frangipane. Why don’t we do this every night? She cooed after our frolics So, now we do and that is why We’re toothless alcoholics.
February, you're sublime Romantic, cool and flirty Who will admit to twenty-nine But draws the line at thirty
January’s no one’s friend A month that lingers without end No end to winter’s deepest chill Which steals the breath and makes us ill No end to counting every dime From letting go at Christmastime To resolutions boldly made Then just as quietly betrayed No reason to buy a bouquet No fireworks No Mother’s Day … Continue reading Best Before Date