Ballerinas stand on toes To dazzle us with twirls But here’s the question I would pose: Why not hire taller girls?
When dining out we’re well aware Our manners are on view We open doors like Fred Astaire Insisting... After you! Which silverware to use and when And how to hold a glass While tackling pommes parisienne Delineate one’s class. But not so in the cinema The difference is stark Because it’s hard to be bourgeois … Continue reading Creature Feature
We have a hedge - when I say we I’m merely being neighbourly Which separates us from next door We’re Number Two, he’s Number Four. The hedge is green and not that tall And forms a living, breathing wall That houses hedgehogs, snails and toads Who are no match for busy roads. The problem is, … Continue reading Bushwhacked
My mother was a medical professional who worked long hours. When she came home in the evenings her day didn’t end there because she would then make supper, ask about everyone’s day, referee arguments, help us with our homework, find team uniforms, sort out bedtimes, do the dishes, do laundry, iron, wait up for my … Continue reading Maximum Overload
Half of ladybugs are dudes Biologists agree But just so things aren't misconstrued: What would their pronouns be?
The queue for anything is just so long, you wouldn’t dare cut Imagine then, the queue, the day we all go for a haircut
Social Distancing still stands Love's rules are not allowed Two metres favours just one man: The very well-endowed
In this age of doublespeak, I've come up with alternative definitions for the following: (this will be added to on a regular basis) burger: what tigers say when they're cold understandable: what a bull whisperer is paid to do dresser: the valet's job earring: tinnitus tumour: ordering another round for you and a mate former: … Continue reading Same Difference
Today the Queen turns ninety-four Her subjects wish her many more Except the heir, on bended knee Who hoped she'd go at ninety-three
Nature’s stopped us in our tracks With one of her surprise attacks Perhaps to kick us into touch Because she doesn’t like us much The only thing that does desire us Is this damned Coronavirus Ironic, because when it strikes us It’s just saying that it likes us