When greeting guests in Tokyo The custom is to bow down low While in Tibet both old and young Say hi by sticking out their tongue In France it’s chic to peck the cheek And friends will clap in Mozambique Though Greenlanders will sniff your face Before they help you with your case. Most Eskimos … Continue reading Seasoned Greetings
The brains behind the pencil Made his mark which we commend But smarter still's his wife Who stuck a rubber on the end
Of Cleopatra it was said Her loves were so prolific That writing down her antics led To six new hieroglyphics
But somewhere, somehow Judas turned And walked away from all he’d learned So when the two men dipped their bread They both knew one would soon be dead. We’re not sure how it came to this Why he betrayed him with a kiss To bring about the earthly end Of someone he had called a … Continue reading Double Cross
Beware the Ides! foretells the fallOf he who rose to conquer GaulAnd lands still further from his homeThis warrior, this son of Rome.On his return to claim his rightA haruspex with second sightMet Caesar by the Senate archTo warn him of the Ides of March.They’d killed an ox and found no spleenAn omen that could … Continue reading Arch Nemesis
My love is like a red red rose… One Scottish bard chose to expose. My ex was like a Yucca plant And on the yeuch I’m adamant.
The figure on the mountain knewFar higher than the eagle flewBeyond the sun and past the lightWere men who crossed the sky by night.Soon after dusk their fires appearedThen slowly, once a course was steeredTheir caravan set out en masseTo make its empyreal pass. Like beasts migrating on the plainsLike swarms that form to greet … Continue reading Constellation Prize
Imagine sitting by a lake And wondering what it would take To calculate its area The formula would scare ya. Or fancy while beneath a tree You’re struck by thoughts of gravity Quite tough with which to grapple Whilst snacking on an apple. Or say you're watching tortoises When what you start to notice is … Continue reading A Sine of Genus
Without any apology I traced my genealogy In hope I’d find an entry Replete with well-heeled gentry. Perhaps a Duke without an heir Yet to bequeath his titled lair Or better yet a Duchess Who’d keep me in her clutches. I dreamed of billionaire tycoons Who sipped and supped from silver spoons Whose present state … Continue reading Branch Locator
While sailors open drums of rum To swig below the decks Indulgent captains who succumb Are often found in wrecks
