Sphere Anxiety

Those folks who claim the Earth is flat Aren't certain where the edge is at Perhaps a flat brain can’t absorb As much as one shaped like an orb

Smooth Operators

When Alexander Graham Bell Phoned Mr Watson he knew well The pair of friends would make a killing By next inventing monthly billing

Pen Pals

"The pen is mightier than the sword" A proposition best ignored For, rare it is men are agreed Still rarer, pirates who can read

Captain’s Log

Sir Francis Drake had what it takes To sail around the world And followed in Magellan’s wake With England’s flag unfurled. Along his route he plundered loot Until the hold was packed With millions from Brazilians And the Spaniards he attacked. On his return, the English yearned To learn of far off places Of queens … Continue reading Captain’s Log →

Local Weirdough

“I’ve gone into hiding.” “We’re in Pizza Hut.” “That’s what they want you to think,” Laverne lowered her voice. “Look around… what do you see?” “Happy fat people.” “All of them?” “All the ones eating pizza,” I was able to confirm. “What about him on his own over at the salad bar? What’s his story?” … Continue reading Local Weirdough →

Seasoned Greetings

When greeting guests in Tokyo The custom is to bow down low While in Tibet both old and young Say hi by sticking out their tongue. In France it’s chic to peck the cheek And friends will clap in Mozambique Though Greenlanders will sniff your face Before they help you with your case. Most Eskimos … Continue reading Seasoned Greetings →

2B or not 2B

The brains behind the pencil Made his mark which we commend But smarter still's his wife Who stuck a rubber on the end

Pyramid Schemer

Of Cleopatra it was said Her loves were so prolific Recording all their antics led To six new hieroglyphics

Double Cross

But somewhere, somehow Judas turned And walked away from all he’d learned So when the two men dipped their bread They both knew one would soon be dead. We’re not sure how it came to this Why he betrayed him with a kiss To bring about the earthly end Of someone he had called a … Continue reading Double Cross →

Arch Nemesis

Beware the Ides! foretells the fallOf he who rose to conquer GaulAnd lands still further from his homeThis warrior, this son of Rome.On his return to claim his rightA haruspex with second sightMet Caesar by the Senate archTo warn him of the Ides of March.They’d killed an ox and found no spleenAn omen that could … Continue reading Arch Nemesis →