Ballerinas stand on toes To dazzle us with twirls But here’s the question I would pose: Why not hire taller girls?
We have a hedge - when I say we I’m merely being neighbourly Which separates us from next door We’re Number Two, he’s Number Four. The hedge is green and not that tall And forms a living, breathing wall That houses hedgehogs, snails and toads Who are no match for busy roads. The problem is, … Continue reading Bushwhacked
My mother was a medical professional who worked long hours. When she came home in the evenings her day didn’t end there because she would then make supper, ask about everyone’s day, referee arguments, help us with our homework, find team uniforms, sort out bedtimes, do the dishes, do laundry, iron, wait up for my … Continue reading Maximum Overload
Half of ladybugs are dudes Biologists agree But just so things aren't misconstrued: What would their pronouns be?
The queue for anything is just so long, you wouldn’t dare cut Imagine then, the queue, the day we all go for a haircut
The new teacher entered the classroom and took her seat, greeting no one. Perpetua Tightwaters was having a bad day but her deportment made it impossible for the students to tell because she held only one expression in her armoury: disapproval. A fierce-looking woman with grey-blue eyes which devoured their prey whole, she could scan … Continue reading Don’t Stand So Close To Me
Every evening after dinner my dogs take me for a walk. On the way to the park we drop in on certain elderly neighbours who are always pleased to see Gizmo and Spark, having had dogs of their own in younger days. One neighbour in particular, Old Ed, is especially fond of Gizmo who himself … Continue reading Bad Hare Day
If it's your wish To swim with fish Give it less arms And lots more swish
It isn’t only spring When Nature has a fling 'Cause I don't know one rabbit Who isn’t always at it
"Why are you in school?" "What do you mean? "I mean: Why are you in school? I'm in school because my parents are Key Workers." "Mine are as well." "My father's a Member of Parliament and my mother's a doctor. What do yours do again?" "My dad stacks shelves at ASDA and my mom works … Continue reading Lockdown Knockdown