Boxing Clever

Last week, I received a surprise phone call from my doctor.“Mr Ormsby?”“Yes.”“Oh, good… so you’re not dead then. It’s Dr Shapiro here. We need to make you an appointment.”“Club fees due?”“Not 'til October.”“Daughter getting married?”“Chance would be a fine thing.”“Class action going ahead?”“It worked on macaques, didn't it?”“Okay, you got me,” I conceded defeat.“I need … Continue reading Boxing Clever

If It Ain’t Baroque…

Nudism in cubism Falls under The Abstract And artist folk behind each stroke Admit it’s inexact. The avant garde can leave some jarred So, should you choose to pose Don’t be surprised to find your eyes Where most look for their toes.

Mother of Invention

At Cana, water turned to wine Delighting all the guests And showed the world The Great Divine Considers all requests. Although some question Was it prayer? Or did a son discover The force behind a mother's glare Is unlike any other?

Soviet Reunion

I've not written for some time but I'm now posting again. The thing is, I have friends in Ukraine whom I've known for a great many years. I visit them once, sometimes twice, annually so it's been tough watching recent events in the news. I travelled there in October when the signs of war were … Continue reading Soviet Reunion

Peace Nicked

“Have you been following events in The Ukraine?” “John, we no longer call it that.” “No longer call what what?” “We no longer call it The Ukraine.” “What are you talking about?” “We just say Ukraine now; they've dropped the The,” Laverne gave me the lowdown. “Who did?” “The Ukrainians.” “Don’t you mean Ukrainians?” “That’s … Continue reading Peace Nicked

No Fly Zone

Where do storks nest during a warAs spires tumble and towns are no more?What will deer eat when tanks advanceOver sweet meadows of young, tender plants?What drives a cub out of the denCrying alone for its mother again?Gone is the goldDark is the dawnGhostly and coldBest to fly on

Glamour Puss

The platypus unsettles those Who organise their socks in rows Who’d never sport a check with stripes The this-goes-better-with-that types. Is it both mammal and a bird? The mere suggestion is absurd A beaver that can lay an egg? Now try and pull the other leg… Although it doesn’t quack or cluck At first glance, … Continue reading Glamour Puss