St Valentine’s Day Mascara

I gave my heart to you, my loveOne February nightInvoking all that's up aboveI prayed you’d hold it tight.And after we had made romance(for that’s what I still call it)You rose and gave a loving glanceThen made off with my wallet.The next day you were seen at lunchWith someone I don’t knowBut looking back, I … Continue reading St Valentine’s Day Mascara

Loco Motives

The day I want to bake some bread You’ll be the first to know Were you confused that time I said I need to make more dough? And should I wish to buy a goat Around the holidays Feel free to name it but take note I'd like it honey-glazed. A scented candle lets me … Continue reading Loco Motives

Secret Santa

The day before The Night BeforeThe office turned into a storeWith gifts galore from Santa’s stockAt lunchtime, right on one o’clock A furtive glance across the roomAs someone tried to wrap perfumeA figure hunched behind a fern(the new girl had a lot to learn) A friend will cough to help a mateDisguise the sound of … Continue reading Secret Santa

A Sine of Genus

Imagine sitting by a lake And wondering what it would take To calculate its area The formula would scare ya. Or fancy while beneath a tree You’re struck by thoughts of gravity Quite tough with which to grapple Whilst snacking on an apple. Or say you're watching tortoises When what you start to notice is … Continue reading A Sine of Genus

Just Desserts

“My dry cleaner’s been wearing my clothes when she goes on dates,” Laverne announced.“How do you know?”“Last night she posted a picture of herself in a dress identical to one I dropped off two days ago.”“How’d she look in it?” I asked tentatively.“Fabulous.”“Bitch.”“Exactly.”“Want me to cut her?”“We’ll swing by on the way home. On Saturdays, … Continue reading Just Desserts