Nudism in cubism Falls under The Abstract And artist folk behind each stroke Admit it’s inexact. The avant garde can leave some jarred So, should you choose to pose Don’t be surprised to find your eyes Where most look for their toes.
At Cana, water turned to wine Delighting all the guests And showed the world The Great Divine Considers all requests. Although some question Was it prayer? Or did a son discover The force behind a mother's glare Is unlike any other?
The ostrich claims the biggest eggs The longest neck and strongest legs. Give thanks these birds don't fly about Because one turd would knock you out.
“Have you been following events in The Ukraine?” “John, we no longer call it that.” “No longer call what what?” “We no longer call it The Ukraine.” “What are you talking about?” “We just say Ukraine now; they've dropped the The,” Laverne gave me the lowdown. “Who did?” “The Ukrainians.” “Don’t you mean Ukrainians?” “That’s … Continue reading Peace Nicked
The platypus unsettles those Who organise their socks in rows Who’d never sport a check with stripes The this-goes-better-with-that types. Is it both mammal and a bird? The mere suggestion is absurd A beaver that can lay an egg? Now try and pull the other leg… Although it doesn’t quack or cluck At first glance, … Continue reading Glamour Puss
My valentine suggested wine I bought the best champagne Then after making love we dined On Chocolate Frangipane. Why don’t we do this every night? She cooed after our frolics So, now we do and that is why We’re toothless alcoholics.
January’s no one’s friend A month that lingers without end No end to winter’s deepest chill Which steals the breath then makes us ill No end to counting every dime From letting go at Christmastime To resolutions boldly made Then just as quietly betrayed No reason to buy a bouquet No fireworks, no Mother’s Day. … Continue reading Best Before Date
The word for hippopotamus Ain't half big as its bottom is
Said Narcissus's missus: No kiss is as his is...
Take me to that fabled time When destiny was more sublime When noble quests were blessed by God Himself Where crones intoned prophetic rhymes While wizards read the stars for signs And deep within each hollow hid an elf. Take me to a time before When magic could unlock a door And conjurers cried out … Continue reading Knight Shift
Mr Ormsby At Large 