Peace Nicked

“Have you been following events in The Ukraine?” “John, we no longer call it that.” “No longer call what what?” “We no longer call it The Ukraine.” “What are you talking about?” “We just say Ukraine now; they've dropped the The,” Laverne gave me the lowdown. “Who did?” “The Ukrainians.” “Don’t you mean Ukrainians?” “That’s … Continue reading Peace Nicked

No Fly Zone

Where do storks nest during a warAs spires tumble and towns are no more?What will deer eat when tanks advanceOver sweet meadows of young, tender plants?What drives a cub out of the denCrying alone for its mother again?Gone is the goldDark is the dawnGhostly and coldBest to fly on

Model Behaviour

“I’m being sued by the Catholic Church again,” Laverne announced in the midst of reorganising her purse.“I have no words for that.”“How unlike you,” she mused.“Hold on, I thought you were working on a piece about the East African Lion,” I suddenly remembered.“Turns out all they do is sleep. My son can do that.”“Have you … Continue reading Model Behaviour

Local Weirdough

“I’ve gone into hiding.” “We’re in a Pizza Hut.” “That’s what they want you to think,” Laverne lowered her voice. “Look around… what do you see?” “Happy fat people.” “All of them?” “All the ones eating pizza,” I was able to confirm. “What about him on his own over at the salad bar? What’s his … Continue reading Local Weirdough

Comet me, Bro!

“Trump’s building a Death Star,” Laverne announced whilst reloading. “Good for him.”“For building a Death Star?”“For keeping busy during lockdown.”“Is it a family affair?”“He’ll fly it and Melania’s going to serve the drinks.“I imagine there'll be a launch…”“By invitation only in the Space Force Lounge at Mar-A-Lago Int’l Airport.”“Tickets won’t be cheap.”“You could just buy … Continue reading Comet me, Bro!