Sue sits at her laptop Pinging emails to herself Andy’s new ZOOM backdrop Is a virtual bookshelf Pete’s touched base with Linked-In To float this week’s ideation Debbie’s power-thinking More proactive penetration. Management consultants Hoped that Covid would pay out Not to be insultant But such optics are in doubt. Companies aren’t calling They're too … Continue reading Counsel Culture
The queue for anything is just so long, you wouldn’t dare cut Imagine then the queue the day we all go for a haircut
Social Distancing still stands So flirting's not allowed Two metres favours just one man: The very well-endowed
Nature’s stopped us in our tracks With one of her surprise attacks Perhaps to kick us into touch Because she doesn’t like us much The only thing that does desire us Is this damned Coronavirus Ironic, because when it strikes us It’s just saying that it likes us
The new teacher entered the classroom and took her seat, greeting no one. Perpetua Tightwaters was having a bad day but her deportment made it impossible for the students to tell because she held only one expression in her armoury: disapproval. A fierce-looking woman with grey-blue eyes which devoured their prey whole, she could scan … Continue reading Don’t Stand So Close To Me
"Why are you in school?" "What do you mean? "I mean Why are you in school? I'm in school because my parents are Key Workers." "Mine are as well." "My father's a Member of Parliament and my mother's a doctor. What do yours do again?" "My dad stacks shelves at ASDA and my mom works … Continue reading Lockdown Knockdown
“I feel like a Stepford Wife.” “That explains the outfit then.” “No, I’m serious. I no longer feel comfortable buying just anything, only what’s needed,” Laverne made her way down the cookie aisle. “We’re being reprogrammed to become more altruistic which I guess isn’t a bad thing.” “Toilet paper’s that way,” I pointed behind her. … Continue reading Aisle Stand By You
“I’m watching you,” the voice came down the phone.“Where are you?” I asked, pulling into the car park.“Drive straight on until you see a yellow Smart Car. I’m just past it on the right.”“Did you say yellow Smart Car?”“I know, don’t even...”“Who in their right mind drives around in a yellow Smart Car?”“Banana Man.”“Who’s Banana … Continue reading Thank Queue
We sent the students home todayAnd then wrote off the yearAgreeing we would all downplayThe panic and the fear.The younger ones all whooped and cheeredAs soon as they were toldThen out the door they disappearedTo watch events unfold.The seniors nervously dispersedFirst, shell-shocked, then resignedThis endgame they had not rehearsedWould leave some friends behind.Worse still, I … Continue reading In Emergency: Break Class
